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I don’t want a maybe,
an I don’t know or
a one-day-soon.
I don’t want just the
thought of it, an it
sounds nice but
-- you’re not sure.

I do not want more
empty words,  or
mere thirds of
the experience.
I want more than
temptation, obligation,
contemplation and
frustration.

I want undoubting
Yes or no, a
mind made up,
a stay or go.

Give me sincerity
And clarity; I want
honesty, fidelity,
and morality.

I want a true reality.

Truth in this reality.

I don’t want nights
and weekends.
I want your Monday
through Friday...

And Sunday mornings.

I want to love without
needing warning.

I’m not asking for a
happily ever after.
I’m asking for
hard times
mixed with laughter.
:iconmissunderstand:

Author's Comments

I’m not asking to be
placed on a pedestal,
I just want to be more
than ornamental.

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconautumnclarity:
The last part of the poem really hit home for me; "I'm asking for hard times mixed with laughter" -- I couldn't say it better myself :nod:. As for any suggestions, perhaps adding "an" in front of "undoubting" in the third strophe since it reads slightly awkward (to me). I also noticed that there's a lot of abstractions in this (e.g. temptation, obligation, fidelity, truth etc.) and no concrete imagery. However, I personally feel this is alright; it's as if the persona is laying everything bare (no sugar-coating), demanding an answer equally as frank.

--
"I must remember it has always been like this: those Trojan women learning their fates; the simple sharpness of the guillotine. A filigree of cruelty adorns every culture." (Linda Pastan – A Rainy Country)
:iconmissunderstand:
I don't want images, dreams or fantasy.
I want truth in this reality.

--
----
I'm not going to ask you to,
but it would be nice,
if my gallery had visit from you.
:iconblue-strawberry:
"I want to love without
needing warning.

I’m not asking for a
happily ever after.
I’m asking for
hard times
mixed with laughter."

I love the end. The flow feels really good to me as well.

--
You have four nostrils, just to let you know.
:iconmissunderstand:
Thank you, that's my favourite part as well.
:glomp:

--
----
I'm not going to ask you to,
but it would be nice,
if my gallery had visit from you.
:iconyouinventedme:
great close,
and oh! how I can
relate to this.
:iconmissunderstand:
Thank you, thank you.
I like the ending as well.

--
----
I'm not going to ask you to,
but it would be nice,
if my gallery had visit from you.
:iconpardonm3:
I don’t want nights
and weekends.
I want your Monday
through Friday...

And Sunday mornings.


=)

And the close makes me think of a mixed drink.
:iconmissunderstand:
I like that part too.

A mixed drink you say?
I think that's a good thing, I like mixed drinks...

--
----
I'm not going to ask you to,
but it would be nice,
if my gallery had visit from you.

Details

March 9
1.0 KB

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